2013-01-31
When everything hits you...
I guess this was what Braggy was feeling during our Xmas party last year.
I texted my editor-in-chief, Patrick, how sorry I was that I won’t be able to help with an article tomorrow as I had previously promised last Monday because of requirements I need to accomplish if I want to to continue to study internationally on September.
I was in DLSU earlier but wasn’t able to see Patrick at all because I really needed to tell him that I can’t come to school anymore because of helping out at my uncle’s company. And when he replied tonight that it was ok and the usual “toh naman” and imagining him saying it. I started to tear up.
It wasn’t just not being able to go to school tomorrow but not able to go to Braggy’s party tomorrow night that’s been nagging me.
I suddenly realized that I won’t be seeing this people everyday, when I’ve gotten used to them for the past year or so working for TLS. I then realized that I’m gonna miss them terribly. It’s not just about graduation, but not being able to hear the stories, to hang-out in the office, to work on articles…
I’m going to miss these people.
It’s funny how I’ve been a member of the USG for my entire stay in DLSU and TLS for half of it and yet I feel so sad leaving TLS. (I’m still crying right now.)
I’m inside my room, blasting music, so that my parents won’t notice that I’m sobbing like someone just broke my heart because a group of people just did. Well technically it’s my fault for leaving.
It’s going to be me reminiscing about all those times I had to climb up the 5 flights of stairs just to reach that noisy, filled with joy and laughter office that would instantly grow silent when Sir Randy or Ate Ella knocks on the door. The room where you can never actually accomplish anything because you’re too busy laughing at someone’s story or joke or acting skills. The couch where newbies would sit and eventually an editor or an older staffer would approach them and get them to talk.
I’m going to miss those days…I’m going to miss TLS so much that it’s basically breaking my heart. These are the people I could always turn to, the people who actually made my life in La Salle worth while. These are the best people you’ll ever meet and if you’re a Lasallian reading this, come June join because the best people you’ll ever meet in your lifetime will be these people.
TLS, I never thought you’d do this me, turn me into an emotional wreck. I love you and I will miss you and I just wish I didn’t have to leave but I do. And I join another publication in the future, one publication will forever have a place in my heart and that’s the bastion of issue-oriented critical thinking, The La Sallian.
2013-01-30
950th Post
Is boring because basically I repeated my day yesterday. Waking up early, praying, downloading some stuff and reading...reading...reading.
Got some writing done and well that's just about it.
At least tomorrow will sure be an eventful day!
kai-Out!
Got some writing done and well that's just about it.
At least tomorrow will sure be an eventful day!
kai-Out!
2013-01-29
Read, read, read...
And four hours blew by so fast because all I did today was read and read and read laws and stuff and my mind has turned into mush...
Good thing is my dad brought home different chocolates and now I am a happy worker! (Even though my eyes hurt with all the words, I've read today!)
Good thing is my dad brought home different chocolates and now I am a happy worker! (Even though my eyes hurt with all the words, I've read today!)
2013-01-28
Back in Taft
Went to DLSU for the Job Expo and to fix some articles. Hopefully I can finally tell Patrick what I've been fearing...I just can't do everything...I have to give on one area and there it is.
It was fun seeing everyone earlier and I saw Steph! Yeah! Lunch with Kim, Neens, Ana, Michelle and Nina! Haha!
Articles...ahhh. I can't do this anymore...I need a miracle with my life or something.
It was fun seeing everyone earlier and I saw Steph! Yeah! Lunch with Kim, Neens, Ana, Michelle and Nina! Haha!
Articles...ahhh. I can't do this anymore...I need a miracle with my life or something.
2013-01-27
Back to reality
Well back to normal as my grandmother said. She wants everything to be back to normal, so we can all get used to the idea that we had lost another member of our family.
We went to Quezon City today then went to Casimiro to bid farewell to my godmother who is going back to the US on the first week of February.
On top of it all, I'll be going to Taft tomorrow for the Job Fair and a few articles I need to sort out before really bidding good-bye to my Lasallian life.
I feel so bloated because of eating too much food today.
kai-Out!
We went to Quezon City today then went to Casimiro to bid farewell to my godmother who is going back to the US on the first week of February.
On top of it all, I'll be going to Taft tomorrow for the Job Fair and a few articles I need to sort out before really bidding good-bye to my Lasallian life.
I feel so bloated because of eating too much food today.
kai-Out!
2013-01-25
Exhausting
Spent the entire day, I think standing up.
Was at Kuya JR's wake most of the day, taking care of my hper-active niece who seems to have me a third favorite. Because she kept screaming my name followed by screaming Issa's name.
There were so many people earlier and it was just tiring.
Yesterday, spent the entire day well most of it asleep.
Was at Kuya JR's wake most of the day, taking care of my hper-active niece who seems to have me a third favorite. Because she kept screaming my name followed by screaming Issa's name.
There were so many people earlier and it was just tiring.
Yesterday, spent the entire day well most of it asleep.
2013-01-23
Gone too soon
My cousin died today. He was 24 years old. My mother side has been in a roller-coaster ride this week. My uncle was rushed to the hospital because of high blood pressure this weekend and then this happens.
He was the best friend (cousin) of my older brother who passed away roughly 11 years ago. They were so tight that they got into trouble most of the time together. They were so annoying but they were down right funny and I'm guessing right know they're back together having fun in heaven.
I've never seen, heard or want to see and hear the cries I heard today. It's seeing and hearing the people you care about howling in despair and you know you can't do anything about it. Many people kept saying that at least he wasn't in pain, that it was quick and that's he's in heaven but that's just it...he's gone. He's no longer here and we were just caught by surprise...it was like a big punch in your gut. Kuya JR is gone and he's never coming back.
How do you explain something like that to a three year old? How do you explain something like this to other people? What happens to living a long life and going day by day in routine? What happens to having your youngest son die in front of you? Better yet, what happens when another of your grandchildren die before you do?
What happens when another brother of yours, die?
Like my aunt said earlier today, it's like your world literally stops. It was just totally unexpected...I mean he was woken up because it was his turn to use the shower and go to work...but then he collapsed and everything changed.
Funny, that it was also our grandmother's birthday today.
This has been the longest day of my entire life and at the ride home...I wish that it would just end. Tomorrow, Kuya JR will still be dead, as well as another brother or cousin or son or grandchild or co-worker or friend or stranger out in the world. The statistics of people dying doesn't help it at all. Honestly, nothing helps this situation at all.
He was the best friend (cousin) of my older brother who passed away roughly 11 years ago. They were so tight that they got into trouble most of the time together. They were so annoying but they were down right funny and I'm guessing right know they're back together having fun in heaven.
I've never seen, heard or want to see and hear the cries I heard today. It's seeing and hearing the people you care about howling in despair and you know you can't do anything about it. Many people kept saying that at least he wasn't in pain, that it was quick and that's he's in heaven but that's just it...he's gone. He's no longer here and we were just caught by surprise...it was like a big punch in your gut. Kuya JR is gone and he's never coming back.
How do you explain something like that to a three year old? How do you explain something like this to other people? What happens to living a long life and going day by day in routine? What happens to having your youngest son die in front of you? Better yet, what happens when another of your grandchildren die before you do?
What happens when another brother of yours, die?
Like my aunt said earlier today, it's like your world literally stops. It was just totally unexpected...I mean he was woken up because it was his turn to use the shower and go to work...but then he collapsed and everything changed.
Funny, that it was also our grandmother's birthday today.
This has been the longest day of my entire life and at the ride home...I wish that it would just end. Tomorrow, Kuya JR will still be dead, as well as another brother or cousin or son or grandchild or co-worker or friend or stranger out in the world. The statistics of people dying doesn't help it at all. Honestly, nothing helps this situation at all.
2013-01-22
22 and I
The 22nd of every month is really just a special day for me! And today was not exception. It's like my luckiest day of every month.
Today, I saw the list of graduates and HMN was next to it. Sure I wanted CLD or MLD or SLD but hey at least there was still something written beside my name! And gosh darn it, my name is on that list! The list of graduating students this February!
Also, I read The Fault In Our Stars and I finished it in roughly four hours because I just couldn't put it down. Literally. It was just a work of art like Looking For Alaska before and it was perfect. Inspired me to write once again and I am finishing a story. (Although it is fanfiction, I am finishing it.)
I was pretty much stuck all by myself in my cousin's house with either the laptop, the TV, my phone, a book and my cousin's Ipad as a companion. And hey, I made it through the day with high hopes for some of the things I need to do.
Anyway, the bed is calling and I am turning in early because gosh darn it I was already awake by 4 am. So, hello sleep and dreamland!
kai-Out!
2013-01-21
That was a very long hiatus, the very long post
Yes, I know. Supposedly this is my diary to give my children when I grow old or even to look back and reminisce. Well there's going to be a huge chunk missing. I the next few days will be the going back to those days and enumerate if there are things to be remembered from November 5 to January 21.
I can recall the past few days... I think but then again I have to if I really want to fulfill the purpose of this blog in the entire point!
Oh well, then let's start with today! My day started out ordinarily and the same as the past few weeks that classes have started and I am all alone at home because I don't go to school anymore because I'm just waiting for graduation this February. But then it turned into a baby sitting thing for my cousin whose father (and my godfather) is confined in the hospital because of high blood. Now, I am at Sta Rosa. And we have the entire house to ourselves. Then again, she's going on a field trip tomorrow so the entire day I'll be all alone.
Yesterday, Sunday, we went to Quezon City as usual and visited my godfather in the hospital. I heard mass at 7:30 in the morning because of what happened on Saturday. Downloaded and watched LesMis.
(Jan. 19) Saturday we watched Les Miserables. We, being my cousins and aunts and an uncle at SM North Edsa. The entire family (not including me though) also attended the wedding so we were basically at Project 8, Quezon City the entire day. And I basically spend the morning and bits of the afternoon watching movies and shows from my external.
(Jan. 18) Friday, I went to Makati because the rents and I were watching Les Miserables at Greenbelt. I stayed at the Greenbelt Family Lounge for more or less two hours. My mom and I ate at Papa Johns because my dad was still looking for a parking space. I then played some arcade at Timezone were I won a Superman stuff toy while my dad ate his dinner at a coffee shop. The movie made me cry, and ti made me cry as well during the second time I watched it. In my defense, the second time, my cousin cried as well.
(Jan. 17) Thursday, was again the same routine of waking up early, checking the internet, watching Hawaii Five-O classic whilst waiting for the Russian Holmes download to finish. Which has been going on for a week already. And also everyday, I'm looking and applying for jobs.
I can't remember anymore but I have to don't I? Well, I'll just have to try extra hard. The usual happened this Xmas break, sleeping at Quezon City for the last time since I'm already of working classification. Having that blowout lunch when I was at my OJT. Having the quatro term, and getting that 99.8 grade for Positive Psychology, that was very unexpected. The DEFENSE of my thesis. The speech for consideration for the recognition. My final day as an undergrad. The Xmas parties and dinners with friends. The duel with Jan-Ace and basically everything else! :) 2012 ended with a bang and 2013 started with different experiences that coincides with me growing up and being in the harsh world of what is called LIFE.
But hey, I can still write, and that's what I'm doing right now. Time to live LIFE and not let it bring me down.
I can recall the past few days... I think but then again I have to if I really want to fulfill the purpose of this blog in the entire point!
Oh well, then let's start with today! My day started out ordinarily and the same as the past few weeks that classes have started and I am all alone at home because I don't go to school anymore because I'm just waiting for graduation this February. But then it turned into a baby sitting thing for my cousin whose father (and my godfather) is confined in the hospital because of high blood. Now, I am at Sta Rosa. And we have the entire house to ourselves. Then again, she's going on a field trip tomorrow so the entire day I'll be all alone.
Yesterday, Sunday, we went to Quezon City as usual and visited my godfather in the hospital. I heard mass at 7:30 in the morning because of what happened on Saturday. Downloaded and watched LesMis.
(Jan. 19) Saturday we watched Les Miserables. We, being my cousins and aunts and an uncle at SM North Edsa. The entire family (not including me though) also attended the wedding so we were basically at Project 8, Quezon City the entire day. And I basically spend the morning and bits of the afternoon watching movies and shows from my external.
(Jan. 18) Friday, I went to Makati because the rents and I were watching Les Miserables at Greenbelt. I stayed at the Greenbelt Family Lounge for more or less two hours. My mom and I ate at Papa Johns because my dad was still looking for a parking space. I then played some arcade at Timezone were I won a Superman stuff toy while my dad ate his dinner at a coffee shop. The movie made me cry, and ti made me cry as well during the second time I watched it. In my defense, the second time, my cousin cried as well.
(Jan. 17) Thursday, was again the same routine of waking up early, checking the internet, watching Hawaii Five-O classic whilst waiting for the Russian Holmes download to finish. Which has been going on for a week already. And also everyday, I'm looking and applying for jobs.
I can't remember anymore but I have to don't I? Well, I'll just have to try extra hard. The usual happened this Xmas break, sleeping at Quezon City for the last time since I'm already of working classification. Having that blowout lunch when I was at my OJT. Having the quatro term, and getting that 99.8 grade for Positive Psychology, that was very unexpected. The DEFENSE of my thesis. The speech for consideration for the recognition. My final day as an undergrad. The Xmas parties and dinners with friends. The duel with Jan-Ace and basically everything else! :) 2012 ended with a bang and 2013 started with different experiences that coincides with me growing up and being in the harsh world of what is called LIFE.
But hey, I can still write, and that's what I'm doing right now. Time to live LIFE and not let it bring me down.
